Especially here at The Frisky, where we’re all, like, empowered, you know, we need a man with a pair. We Fell Asleep Halfway Through Paragraph 4 of Your 5-Paragraph Email Essay. You have multiple graduate degrees and feel the need to remind us of that fact! There is nothing, nothing more attractive than a man who is confident, and confidence is, frankly, easier to telegraph via email than in person, where all kinds of physical tells can give you and your insecurities away. In addition to this being inherently stupid, it doesn’t work, particularly not these days, because now we all know what negging is, and, yo, we ain’t haven’ it. and you are not afraid to use it with your polysyllabic vocabulary! If a man walks up to a woman and promptly insults her, the theory goes, she will be putty in his hands. Basically, it’s one of those pick-up artist techniques that supposedly gives random dudes mystical powers over the ladies.Apparently, dudes get shut down left and right, and women get winked and emailed to death. Your idea of a first email opening line: “Hello, thank you for checking out my profile,” “Might I say, you are an exceedingly beautiful young lady,” “What u doin rieght now wanna chat im sloppysoupsales on AOL.” Russ Ruggles, who runs Online Dating Matchmaker.com, recommends the “one-line hook.” Pick something specific in our profile and respond to it in an interesting, engaged way. Researching how to get a date online, thinking through your email, and, for the love of God, proofreading it are all well and good, but we are romantics at heart, and we’re looking for a spark. If you check out Online Dating Match Maker.com, you’ll see that it’s men who are sending out plenty of emails, but rarely do they get a return email. Regardless, we here at The Frisky are big fans of the males, and we thought we would explain why you never heard back from us. In an effort to show how hard you can party, you posted pictures of yourself passed out on Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras, getting tased while chasing after the mascot of your favorite team, and wearing a lot of wacky hats. Other crimes against profile pics include you making weird faces, you making the same face in every shot, and you with your ex but with her face crossed out thanks to some spastic Photoshop scrubbing. If the tone of your email reminds us of a conversation we had the other day with the mechanic, we likely will not be responding. In a first email we don’t want your phone number, personal email address, or chat ID anymore that we want your shoe size, your social security number, or number of cavities. Because we get more winks, emails, and what-have-you than men, the fact of the matter is that we’re looking for a reason to say no. As someone who has been on the receiving end, here are some mistakes that have made me hit “delete” or, in the worst cases, “block” on my online dating messages.1.Sounding generic The way to a woman’s heart is making her feel worthy of the same message you’ve sent a dozen other women, right?
Why do women only respond to a small percentage of emails? Let’s say you were asked to select one of the cows in the field to pet.
Most of the subject lines will read something like “26/m Boston” or “hey there sexy”.
Sure, she’ll probably open a few of those, but after a while, they all start sounding the same.
OKCupid's data shows that men receive replies to about 20-50% of their online dating messages, depending on their attractiveness — and I'm going to go out on a limb and say most would like to move that number up to 100%.
While sometimes it's your profile that makes women think twice, I can also attest that your message itself can kill your chances of a response.